Living With My Wife and her Bipolar. Anyone have experience living with a spouce who has bipolar.?
My wife has Bipolar Disorder, thyroid condition and an Eating Disorder. At times you can imagine how difficult things can be in our home. We have a wonderful and bright three year old. Twice now my wife has had an “episode” leading her to believing she’s being drugged, starved, abused and that “they’- meaning the world, have a conspiracy against her. On both occasions the outcome of her delusions has led her to believe that I was the “bad guy”. She has a long history of blaming nearly everyone close to her of doing the above mentioned things to her. The last episode led her to filing for a divorce, making false allegations against me in an effort to take our child from my care. The Courts didn’t fall for it for long. I have sole decision making and primary guardianship of our child. A year later we decided that we could make another go of our relationship. My wife is in treatment and on medication. My question is: Can anyone offer advice for a Dad juggling responsibility. Our child is first and foremost, my wife second and Dad last when possible. My wife is still cycling about every four to six weeks and is now leaving our home at odd hours of the night and coming home around bar closing time. In the past she caused disturbances during her manic cycle. Now she leaves. I love my wife guys. I don’t know how to handle these issues. She weighs about 100lbs dripping wet.
User Comments
- It sounds as if your wife isn't properly medicated or is not taking her medication as prescribed, which is a very common thing. Many people with Bi-Polar disorder love thier manic cycle and don't want to take the prescribed medication because they feel it detracts from thier ability to function. I suggest you get with her pshychiatrist and explain to him what is happening and see if you can get her ilness under control. You mention that she comes home when the bars close or near that time and that makes me think maybe she is also on the road to or already addicted, which is very common for people with this disorder. About the only thing you can do is get her correct treatment and when she is stable give her an ultimatum, she either continues her treatment correctly or you have to leave for your sake and the sake of the child. The reason I say this is you make it sound as if she also has psychotic features with her Bi-polar and this can be very dangerous during an episode. Hope this helps, if you need to tal feel free to email me.
- WOW you sound like a very devoted husband. Most guys wouldn't even put up with any of this!! She's pretty lucky to have you. I think that they have a place where bi-polar people can go for group sessions and if you went with her you might be able to understand and learn how to cope with it better.Ask her doctor where these meetings are held and then maybe attend a few with your wife and see how it goes. Best of Luck to you!!!
- Chemical Dependency Counselor at a state mental facility, I work with dually diagnosed people all the time.
- I have seen numerous causes of people in your situation. The last being my Daughter married to a bi-polar husband and my cousin married to a bi-polar woman.
Their commitment to their children and a happy endowment at home finally caused them to divorce. They became also concern about the affect the condition was having on the children.
They did some quick evalutation of the facts that knew, the primary one that the condition get worst with age.
It is your life, and the life of your child, consider that things may be better for the both of you if you divorced and moved on.